Squirrel Heart

Being a record dork I do my fair share of mailorder. One of the things I look forward to when I’m making that trek from the subway station to my house after work is the possibility of there being an awesome record in my mailbox. It deffinitely beats the hell out coming home to dog vomit and diarrhea all over place like I did a week or so ago. I’ve actually come to a point where I’d say about 75-80% of my music purchases are through the mail. I’ve always supported local record stores but they just don’t seem to carry what I want nowadays and are rendering themselves obsolete for me. RIP Smash, good luck Bobby!

Choosing a mailorder place of business can be tricky. Some just don’t have what you are looking for so they are obviously out. Some are too expensive with shipping etc. or are out of the country. Some don’t update their lists and end up baiting you in, only to leave you with blue balls when you find out a few weeks later they don’t have that ultra rare lp you’ve been looking for forever. Some are just slow and don’t really maintain any kind of communication with their custumers. Sorry to sound all consumer reports here, but these are all important factors in deciding where you want to spend your money. And really folks, for me it all comes down to this.

#1 - You have this record that I want
#2 - I pay you for the record
#3 - Send the record to me right fucking now

Rougly a month and a half ago I ordered records from 6 different label’s and or distros. Havoc, Manic Ride, Velted Renub, Six Weeks, Zaxxon out of Canada, and Interpunk. All of these orders were placed and confirmation of the order was received within a day or within a few days of that first week in april.. Except for Interpunk, which was later. Here is the scouting report on my latest purchases with all these guys.

Havoc - I emailed Felix about a few releases (1st Regress ep, both Regulations eps). He emailed me back and he even offered to pick one of them up at the local record shop. I sent him a check and he got me my records within the week. All costs reasonable and the records rule.
grade= A+

Manic Ride/Crime - I ordered the Buzzov-en cd and the gauze ep on their recently launched site opting for “priority” shipping.. that’s more expensive of course. Over a month went by and I saw that they cashed my check but credited my acount $3.99. I’ve since seen the buzzoven cd in my local record store but nothing in the mail yet. Turns out they sent my order to the wrong address. When it arrived there was a note explaining that prank was going through some kind of distributer limbo. That’s cool, but my order was definitely not treated as “priority”. They’ve done better in the past.
grade= C-

Six Weeks - Sent them a check about a month ago for a few things including the new louder than hell comp with the waste and accused on it.. Which I also saw in my local record store before my order showed up. It took about a month but at least everything was there. They’re normally C+/B students.
grade= C

Zaxxon - I found a original pressing of the Pink Lincolns punk masterpiece “back from the pinkroom”! Soooo stoked. This finally came after about months waiting.. Coming from Canada I guess that’s not unheard of.
grade= B-

Velted Renub - I emailed the guy and got confirmation on my order about a month and a half ago. I’ve since emailed and sent pm’s on certain boards to him. He says I should have gotten my order but I haven’t. I’m not even really psyched to get these records now. I know the dude isn’t trying to rip me off but come on.. His excuse was “I’m just slow”. What the fuck is that shit? grade= Incomplete or F

Interpunk - ordered and got confirmation within 5 minutes. Paid more for shipping but received my order within a week..
grade= A. They’re very consistent.

I seriously have a problem with the way that some of these “punk”, “diy”, “underground” or whatever labels or distros do their business. I think it’s hilarious that people slag interpunk for not being “punk” or are not involved in the “scene” so people shouldn’t support them. News flash here folks.. You gotta deliver the goods when the goods have been paid for. Maybe there is a reason that the guy who runs Interpunk drives a slick beamer and plays golf every week. I’m just using them as an example by the way because of my recent slew of purchases.

So, the grades are in. Let’s get those scores up higher next semester people. Just because you’re in the punk scene doesn’t mean you have to come in last all the time.

“Spill the blood” by Slayer has to be one of my favorite songs ever. This song seriously makes the hair on my neck stand up. The creepy finger picking intro, into the super intense dave lombardo drum fill, all while the song gets louder and louder, til it kicks into full gear. Man, you just can’t really get any more brutal. You constantly hear everyone jocking reign in blood as the best metal album ever and I’m not here to argue against that.. One reason being that arguing stuff like that is pointless and subjective.

Anyway, the point here is that South of Heaven is an absolutely essential record for anyone into music.. Especially those into metal, punk, or hardcore. There is not one dud on this bad boy. I got this tape when it first came out in 88′ I thought it was amazing then. I’ve since had it on all formats over the years and just popped in a burned copy of the reissue and was blown away again. To say this record has staying power is an understatement. And I think it’s utter blasphemy how people dismiss this album in the wake of Reign in blood.. Sure it’s different but instead of writing the same record Slayer added melody without sacrificing any of the sheer evilness and heaviness.. It just lurks in different corners. And I don’t understand these people who complain that this record is slow.. Come on, they must have only listened to the title track. “Silent Scream” and “Ghost of war” are ripping steamrollers that as far as I’m concerned could have fit on Reign in Blood perfectly. I also think this album is where Slayer perfected their midpaced stompers on classics like “Mandatory Suicide” and “Dissident Aggressor”. The layering of the guitars is a style they have made their own.

I wonder if I listened to this record today because someone in my family questioned my fate and whether or not I was going to hell or not recently.. A rather serious subject that I find quite funny. I’m a heathan in comparison, overshadowed by the righteous (yeah ok). You can’t please everyone around you in this life so just stop trying. Well I gues you can try but that gets pretty boring after awhile. Besides who wants to listen to the same record over and over? Not me, that’s for damned sure! Now go listen to this record a few times in a row you pussies.